In my kitchen
Apparitions
Frequently appear in places they’ll get bitten

Paul of Tarsus
In molasses
Matthew, Mark, Luke and John on a chicken carcass

Pope John Paul 2
Was in a stew
Staring at me from a floating piece of tofu

I was amazed
By mayonnaise
Showing the face of Saint Joan the Orléanaise

There is a nun
In my currant bun
Mother Teresa’s visage I see
There is a nun
In my currant bun
But I cannot eat her ‘cause that’s blasphemy

Virgin mother
Peanut butter
Makes a sacred and forbidden fluffernutter

[A bun dance]

I found Jesus
In my cheeses
Later I saw his face in my Reese’s Pieces

Extra cheesy
Really greasy
My Big Mac with fries and Francis of Assisi

Virgin Mary
Topped with cherries
Came to me in frozen yoghurt from Pinkberry

On a fish stick
Was Saint Patrick
Dipped in tartare sauce he is my favourite Catholic

There is a nun
In my currant bun
A holy spinster looking yummy
There is a nun
In my currant bun
So I mustn’t give in to my gluttony

Though my hunger
Makes me wonder
Will the Lord be angered if I lightly munch her?

[A bun dance]

There was a nun
In my currant bun
I smothered her with cowberry jam
There was a nun
In my currant bun
She was heavenly but, alas, I’ve been damned

I was thinner
Before dinner
Then God made me fatter because I’m a sinner