What should be in my glass now?
For it is quite empty, why?
Drank my last whisky last night
No more malty stuff
I had enough
I need something to quaff with ease
I don’t mean a cup of tea
Thinking more like chardonnay
So chill it very nicely
Precisely

I am no sommelier
Won’t stop me anyway

Red wine and white wine I say
I don’t want to be swilling lager
Or that Swedish cider
And no tequila
I need the vino
Red wine and white wine I say
I need to wash down all the manky deli
Cos my digestive system
Is sick of vodka
Oh my poor belly

Needs some grape juice right away
Drop or three of cabernet
That’s exactly what I eye
My tipple of the day
Pinot grey
Oh
I’m gonna open with my teeth
Bottle from Povardarie
Smell the vranec - fine bouquet
A montepulciano
Ti amo!

Heidi taught me all I know
That mountain alco-hoe

Red wine and white wine I say
I don’t want to be swilling lager
Guinness brings dismay
And no mojito
Want tempranillo
Red wine and white wine I say
I need to wash down all the manky deli
Cos my digestive system
Is sick of vodka
Oh my poor belly

Skååååååååååål

Red wine and white wine I say
I don’t want to be swilling lager
I’ll instruct the bar staff
And have the last laugh
Give me the vino
Red wine and white wine I say
I need to wash down all the manky deli
Cos my digestive system
Can’t take the vodka
Oh my poor belly
Red wine and white wine, OK