Put-upon Pizza Hut Employee Throws Her Boss under the Bus

Based on Iceland 2017

#4 wants sparkling water, #5 still need their butter, but table #2?
I wish I knew

We’re not doing haute cuisine – this is Pizza Hut
Can’t remember everything as it piles up
I want to write, but you’re against pen and paper

My recall’s poo
I don’t know what to do
Safer to trust my scrawl than store things in my head
Short-term memory’s really no use
Just drags me into some new caper
I did warn you I haven’t got a clue

I know that somebody wanted no ham even though he was a hot meat feast fan
Someone wants gluten-free dough
That’s important to know, but I’m lost – was it that ugly man at table #2?
Maybe
Perhaps he’ll sue
And then we’ll be in the papers

A court case, too
You’ll need good lawyers to save us
The fault is yours
You’ll get the blame again, just like you did with that old dude fatally allergic to capers
This one’s on you – you told me what to do

E-e-e-e….scape? Ha!
No, not for you
I’d send a prayer to your saviour
If I were you I’d write him (with a pen)
You have well and truly been screwed ’cause of your aversion to paper
Your cell mate’s got a hot meat feast for you