I wear Harris tweed
I don't work as I come from Old Money
Aristocracy, inbred family
Yah I am a very posh lady indeed

Quails eggs are divine with tapenade on organic pain rustique
Cave-aged Roquefort cheese, vintage Pinot Gris
Al fresco, a midweek supper with wealthy company

Baby aubergines sourced at the farmers' market in Provence
Hand-reared Bordeaux veal in a bourguignon
But the finest taste of all is massive schlong

Madame Butterfly: how my soul gets so stirred by Puccini
Concerts where they play darling Débussy
And my heart is soothed when hearing a holy liturgy

Viewing Picasso: marvel at "Las Chicas de Avignon"
Moved by the ballet with the dying swan
But the finest art of all is massive schlong

Yah the finest thing in life:
MA-HOOO-SSIVE SCHLONG
BIG SCHLONG
BIG SCHLONG